5 crucial steps to attracting your soulmate

5 crucial steps to attracting your soulmate

Don’t worry, you’re not going to find any woo woo advice here about manifesting your dream partner, that’s not how I roll. In fact I’m not big on the term soulmate either come to that. However, saying all that, I spent 7/8 years indulging in online dating to find a guy that I felt I could live with and spend good times with creating happy memories until the end of days so I guess that counts as a soulmate. The reason it took me so long to attract my soulmate was because for many of those years my head was not really in the right place. It took me a while to figure it out but I finally realised there were some crucial steps to put in place in order to be at your most ‘soulmate attractive’. Read on to see how I did it…

1. Love yourself like your life depends on it

If I don’t harp on about the importance of loving yourself in every blog post I write, I’d be very surprised. If you’re wondering why, it’s because if I have one message in life it’s this – don’t even think about heading out and looking for sex, love and/or a soulmate without totally loving yourself first. You’ll end up allowing yourself to be treated badly by people who don’t value and appreciate you in all your glory. If you don’t love yourself before embarking on finding your soulmate, what kind of message are you sending out into the universe. How are you going to attract someone who is worthy of you, if you don’t even value yourself?? If you can’t put your hand on your heart right now and say that you love yourself 100%, then I would suggest taking a quick break from dating and reading the book, ‘Love yourself like your life depends on it‘, by Kamal Ravikant. You can read it on your commute home and probably finish it in one sitting, it’s not a long book, but implementing his methods may take a little longer. And yes, this guy knows his stuff. It’s a fantastic book that will get you on track. Once you’re totally loving yourself, you’re ready to embark on that search for the elusive soulmate and trust me, you’re getting closer.

 

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2. Live your life to the max

So, the best way to find your soulmate is to make sure your life isn’t all about finding a soulmate. Confused? Lol, no seriously, get out there and make sure you’re living your life to the full. If you focus on saying yes a lot, trying new things, being open to meeting new people, visiting new places, trying new experiences, scaring yourself at least once a month, you’ll find your life becomes a lot more interesting and you’ll be more likely to meet the kind of people you want to date. In short, you’ll be putting yourself out there and to be honest, that’s one of the quickest ways to find someone special. If you find yourself in a rut, eating at the same restaurants, meeting the same friends, signing on to the same dating site, using that profile you’ve had for four years, eeek, you’re in trouble. If you like what you’re reading but don’t know where to start, head to Meet.com, they have groups for everything you can imagine and they’re probably in your area.

This is about enjoying life, feeling good about yourself, discovering your passions in life rather than focusing on finding a soulmate but what it’s doing is getting your head in the right space to meet them and it’s putting you out there in touch with like-minded and unlike-minded folk in the hope that the chemistry kicks in and you find yourself meeting that someone special.

 

3. Figure out the values that really resonate with you

When I started dating, back in the time of dinosaurs, I was massively into clubbing and house music and it’s probably fair to say that about 80% of the guys I dated at that time were house music DJs. Now don’t get me wrong, those were amazing times and those guys were great, I wouldn’t swap it for the world but what I didn’t realise then that I realise now, is that sharing the exact same music taste isn’t actually necessary in your soulmate. It’s the same with a lot of things – having shared hobbies, liking the same food etc – which while nice to have – aren’t essential in a soulmate. So what do you need to share with your soulmate? Easy, shared values.  A person’s core values, i.e. their fundamental beliefs, are what drives them to make decisions and choices about all the major things in life like where to live, how to bring up children, what life style they lead etc. Many people don’t really stop and think about their core values in that way, when online dating, but it’s quite helpful in guiding you to make good choices about the people you decide to date. My core values, for example were trust, kindness, respect and fun and this helped make good dating decisions that then lead me to my soulmate.

 

4. Don’t shy away from failure 

To find your soulmate, you have to put yourself out there and go on dates with lots of different people, after all how else are you going to find out if they share your core values or not. If you’re afraid of failure when it comes to dating, you’ll be too cautious and not experiment enough. Get comfortable with the fact that you’re probably going to have lots of first dates that don’t go any further. Let yourself know that that’s more than OK, it’s necessary. You need to trust the process if you want to find your soulmate. Don’t allow anyone to make you feel bad about failed dates. You need to set the tone for how people react to your dating stories. If you’re fine with it, so are they.

 

5. Channel optimism

In all your online dating activity, channel optimism. Stay positive at all times. You won’t meet that soulmate if you’re in a bad place about online dating. But if you follow all the steps above, trust me, this won’t be an effort at all. You’ll be loving yourself, loving life and loving the adventures of online dating. Good luck and keep me posted on how it goes!

 

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I think I know which photo is gonna be her ‘talking point’ pic 😆 Our favourite dating profile pics are those that make people feel happy, curious, interested and energised when they see them. This set, taken by Vanessa in Los Angeles, makes me feel all those things and more! Loving them, Vanessa. I love how the client turned up with the energy she wanted to showcase in her photos, dang🔥🔥 Photo credit: Vanessa for Hey Saturday, Los Angeles. #datingapp #datingtips #datingprofile #datingprofilepic #datingphoto #onlinedating #datingphotos #datingpics #onlinedatingtips #datingadvice #single #happysinglelife #brandidentity #personalbranding #personalbrandingtips #visualstorytelling #modernlove #modernromance #datingapps #datingmindset #goodtimeswithgoodpeople #goodtimes
Come for the cool dating profile pics, stay for the ...um cool dating profile pics. Today's big shout out goes to Kimi who shoots south London Loving the vibe of this shoot shot in Peckham. Photo credit: Kimi for Hey Saturday, London #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
I'm in a New York state of a mind today and thought I'd share the vibe. I'm loving these shots taken by Alison in and around SoHo. Photo credit: Alison for Hey Saturday, New York City #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
Earlier this year we launched a new Manchester location and I can’t believe I haven’t shared any pics yet. My bad… So this post is celebrating the joy, colour and spirit of our Salford Quays Hey Saturday photoshoots, thanks to Livia & her photoshoot magic ✨. Shouts out Livia, loving these. Photo credit: Livia for Hey Saturday, Manchester #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
Our photoshoots are an adventure, not a chore. Loving the adventure Vanessa and this client had in Abbot Kinney, LA. These photos are sweet as... Photo credit: Vanessa for Hey Saturday, Los Angeles #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
We see a crazy, bright dating future for this client. Huge shouts out to Alison, who shoots in and around Soho every week, creating dating photo awesomeness like this. Loving these. Photo credit: Alison for Hey Saturday, New York City #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
Time to get out the party poppers 🎉 …. these shots are a whole nuther level of gorgeousness. Huge shouts out to Nicole for these gems, J’adore them so much. Photo credit: Nicole for Hey Saturday, London #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
The real flex is creating dating profile pictures that stand out and help you do you. J'adoring these bold, colourful shots from Livia in the Northern Quarter. Photo credit: Livia for Hey Saturday, Manchester #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #manchesterdating #manchester #manchesterstyle
We’re not just all about the city streets, we do park shoots too 🌿 and… well these profile pics are just a breath of fresh air. We're heading to the parks of Clifton Village in Bristol for these gorgeous shots, taken by our Bristolian super star, Suze. If you want some park photos, autumn is a beautiful time of year to do this… 🍁 Photo credit: Suze for Hey Saturday, Bristol #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
Holy dating photos, I love these. Nicole does her thang at King's Cross with these cool shots. Sweeeeeet work, Nicole. Photo credit: Nicole for Hey Saturday, London #storytelling #visionboarding #datingapp #datingadvice #authentic #authenticity #tinder #newprofilepic #profilepictures #datingphotography #datingphotos #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotographer #brandingphotography #personalbranding #onlinedating #goodtimes #goodvibes #confidence #menstyle #brandidentity #romance #modernlove #joy #happylife
In today's episode of the happiest photoshoots on earth, we hotfoot it over to Bristol for these absolutely cool and stunning shots from our one & only Suze. Absolutely j'adoring these shots, Suze. Kudos to you and this fab client who created actual literal magic together. Photo credit: Suze for Hey Saturday, Bristol #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
Some people just look like they know how to have a good time. Loving these ace dating profile pictures from Kate, who captures personality like a queen. Photo credit: Kate for Hey Saturday, London #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
So yeah, I did a thing… Hey Saturday now has a podcast mini series, ‘Shoot Your Shot - The Art of Dating Profile Pictures’, for all your dating profile photo needs in one place 🎧✨ Press play on this show for jam-packed mini episodes that will inspire you to experiment, have fun and aim higher when creating your profile pictures for online dating apps. I share my top mindset shifts and practical steps you can take to create dating profile photos that are both visually and emotionally compelling, to help you attract more and better quality matches on dating apps. This podcast is for people with a short attention-span but a big vision for their love lives 🙌🏽 Link in bio 👀 Hosted by me, Saskia Podcast logo and art by the incredible @teadayblogs from Coppie and Paste Produced by that cutie @northernmunki Podcast music by me @saskia_nelson in conjunction with GrooveApp (who did most of the heavy lifting to be fair) #datingpodcast #datingpodcasts #newpodcast #newpodcastalert #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happysingle #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
Well these are just a whole vibe. Shouts out to Livia who transforms the streets of Manchester into the perfect Hey Saturday playground & huge kudos to the client who brought his A-game, dang 🙌🏽🏀 Photo credit: Livia for Hey Saturday, Manchester #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
Break time is over.. everyone back on the bus. Summer is speeding to an end but I still have our gorgeous summer shoots to remind me of warmer days. Loving the vibe of these shots taken by Alison in Dumbo - one of my favourite NYC locations. Photo credit: Alison for Hey Saturday, New York City #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
I love all our Hey Saturday locations, but I ain't gonna lie, I have a HUGE soft spot for our Abbot Kinney/Venice shoots. They always inspire joy, love and good times every time I see them - perfect for dating profile pictures. Big ups to Vanessa for these crazy-good shots. Photo credit: Vanessa for Hey Saturday, Los Angeles. #datingapps #onlinedating #datingprofilepic #datingtips #datinglife #singlelife #datingphotographer #onlinedatingphotographersla #onlinedatingphotographer #visualstorytelling #personalbranding #brandingphotography #modernlove #tinderpic #newprofilepic #goodtimes #creative #datingadvice #datingafterdivorce #happylife #joy
I was invited on @unhingedandbumbledup podcast the other day & it was probably the most fun I’ve had recording a podcast. Ahead of the show, I had to give them both a dating photo challenge and they presented the photos they created to me during the show. Tune into to see who does it better, Phil or Jane. It was a super close competition to be honest… but there was a clear winner 👏🏽👏🏽 I also shared • What makes an awesome dating profile pic • Why good photos are so important • My 4 top favourite date spots around the globe (I just couldn’t choose one) and much more… Have you subscribed to this chatty, fun show that shares experiences and opinions on how to navigate the tricky world of dating to come out on top? Thanks for having me Phil & Jane 🙏🏽 #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #newpodcast #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #datingpodcast #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
…how would you show up? I get a lot of emails from clients asking how and where they can do their photoshoots without many people seeing them. Ummm …. To be fair, it’d probably be my first question too, if I were in their shoes. I’m not exactly known for being a natural badass in front of the lens (there’s a reason I prefer being behind it!). But, thing is, those people really don’t care about what’s happening in your photoshoot. And why would you concern yourself worrying about what people - you don’t even know - think about you for 30 seconds? Fear makes no sense, even after you unpick it and challenge it. It’s still there. Being fearless is actually really hard… however you could try this… choose to ‘act as if’ you’re fearless! Yeah, how would that look? How would you show up then? Really think about how you would approach it. And then, just as an experiment, do that. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos
+ The Ex-Philes Podcast + I had the pleasure of being invited onto an episode of the dating podcast, ’The Ex-Philes: Break-ups, Broken Hearts and Moving On’ recently & was interviewed by the two awesome hosts, Clair Lofthouse & Janice Formichella. Thank you so much to both of you, I really enjoyed connecting & sharing my top dating profile picture expertise with you. If you are getting over a breakup? I would highly recommend tuning in & subscribing. Ex-Philes is a weekly podcast all about healing a broken heart, building your confidence, and moving forward in an empowered way. Their favorite topics include healing from heartbreak, dating, ghosting, no contact, toxic relationships, communication, self-help, attachment styles and more. Thanks Janice & Clair 🙏🏽 #onlinedatingphotographer #datingpodcast #singlewomen #singlemen #singlelifestyle #singleandhappy #modernlove #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling
Dating profiles have the potential to be intriguing; they can be a window into someone’s mind, revealing their unique way of looking at & thinking about the world. Make sure you grab that opportunity to show people what you’re about & what you’re made of 🔥🔥 And remember, your profile pics are the most powerful way to share a lot of information about you at just a glance. #onlinedatingphotographer #singlewomen #singlemen #onlinedatingapps #datingphotos #singlelifestyle #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #dating app #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling
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