can’t decide whether to break up or not?
It is time to break up?
I was at a course this weekend, which involved a ton of networking. It was pretty cool because lots of people were intrigued by Saturday Night’s Alright and wanted to know more about what my fabulous job entails. One of the people I met was keen to find out if I had any thoughts on his current situation. He was in an OK relationship but didn’t know whether to ditch his boyfriend or not. He’d felt like that for a while.
Of course I don’t know him or his boyfriend so couldn’t advise him of which way to go. However, what I did say to him (and I’m paraphrasing like crazy here) was that sitting on the fence, humming and haring your life away is a big, fat waste of time. The days may be long but the years are short.
So if you’re in a similar situation, listen up. It’s time for some tough love.
Up there on the fence is not where life is at. Life is what happens when you finally make a decision one way or the other, you hold your breath and you just go for it – you jump off that fence. And then you make the very best of that decision. And keep making decisions and taking action.
To stay or to go?
Are you unsure how to decide? Well here is a good starting point. Score your relationship on the following points out of 10 (with 0 being poor and 10 being amazing).
- do you communicate well?
- are you both committed to future plans?
- are you an affectionate and loving couple?
- do one or other of you feel indifferent a lot of the time?
- do you both trust each other?
- is there any resentment floating round?
- are you living separate lives?
- are either of you feeling unhappy a lot about how things are going?
- are you arguing lots about the big things?
If you’re scoring low on quite a few areas, it’s time to take action and change your status quo. Either decide to take steps to work with your partner and improve things or decide to make a run for it. Either way, you’ll be 100% happier just by making a decision and taking action, I promise.