8 reasons online dating isn’t working for you

8 reasons online dating isn’t working for you

Today, my blog has been taken over by the lovely-named Love Mentor, Elizabeth Sullivan. She works with single, busy professional women who have been concentrating on their career and not focusing on their love life. With coaching, they start to make their love life a priority and identify and change any patterns causing them to date the wrong people. Today, she is highlighting the 8 reasons why online dating might not be working for you. 

8 reasons online dating isn’t working for you…

Online dating is booming, it’s becoming a more and more popular way to meet a partner and has led to many successful relationships. If it’s not working for you, here’s how you can maximise your chances of being one of those lucky couples…

1. Your profile isn’t appealing

People make instant decisions on whether or not they like the look of your profile, having great photos is really important – they need to be both up to date and flattering. Unless you look exactly the same as that super photo you had taken 5 years ago using them is a bad idea and likely to lead to resentment from dates when they meet you. Remember to complete the profile in its in entirety – when you leave gaps it can look as if you are not taking the process seriously. Share but don’t overdo it, people don’t want to everything about you immediately, it’s good to leave a little mystery so there is something they can be curious about. Be honest, be yourself, don’t say you jog or go to the gym regularly if it something you do twice a year, it will come out when you are getting to know someone…

2. You aren’t coming across as a positive person

One of the most attractive things about someone is their attitude. If you are coming across as negative either in your profile, early interactions or when you meet dates it may be off putting. One of my clients was getting a lot of interest from a dating website but as she interacted with guys the interest would tail off. When I looked at her messages I could see why, some of her messages were a bit negative. She hadn’t realised how she was coming across and once she changed her language, men responded very differently to her. Optimistic language matters a lot, everyone wants to be around happy people.

3. You have very narrow expectations

 If you are not being matched with anyone, widen your search criteria, i.e. consider dating someone 10 miles away rather than 5, widen your age range. Be open, will it really matter if she is one inch shorter than your ideal and has brown rather than blonde hair. Be open, explore, go on dates with people you are not your usual type, perhaps the reason you are single is because your ‘type’ isn’t actually right for you.

4. You are not being proactive enough

If you sign up for online dating, it’s important to actually be online and active. Otherwise ‘that’ guy or girl could get in touch and by the time you reply back they have met someone else. Check your chosen website regularly, at a minimum twice a week. If it will help you make an appointment in your diary i.e. Monday and Thursday evenings.

5. You are too keen to meet someone

Often the things we are most attached to have the habit of eluding us. Detachment i.e. doing the right things, taking the steps you need to meet someone– and being open to what happens, let go of the outcome i.e. I would love to meet someone, I have a great life though and if don’t meet someone, I will still enjoy my life. One of my clients took action, she went online dating, she hoped but didn’t expect anything to happen, and on her 8th date she met someone wonderful – a year and a half later they have moved in together and are still really happy.

6. You aren’t in the right place emotionally

If you haven’t moved on from a past relationship or relationships – that will make it hard for you to connect with someone new. You may think you are ready but if you have not done some work on resolving past relationships then that  may be coming across – people can usually tell if someone is not ready – even if you don’t make the classic mistakes like talk about your ex all night.

7. You are not giving out the right vibe

Show your playful, warm, light hearted side. Dating works when it’s fun, playful and light-hearted, that’s what makes people want to meet you and have a second date.

8. You are making fundamental dating mistakes

You might be rushing into it or acting too keen. Take it slowly. Timing matters, just because you have their mobile, and it’s 12 o’clock at night and you’re awake, doesn’t mean it’s a good time to text. As John Steinbeck said ‘If it is right, it happens — the main thing is not to hurry. Nothing good gets away’.

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Online Dating Photographers
Online Dating Photographers
Online Dating Photographers
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✨We are all gorgeous all the time always✨ Dating photoshoot fear? You got this… You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photo shoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
You get a couple of seconds to make an impression, so make those seconds count. Our fave dating photos are ones that are compelling, colourful, creative, story-telling, authentic, vibrant and, of course, ones that make you smile. Great set from Alison in downtown Manhattan, NYC. Photo credit: Alison for Hey Saturday, NYC #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
What are you into? Have fun with your profile pics and use them to visually show people the stuff you love doing and the kind of places you love going. They’ll go down a treat on a dating app near you. Creating your dating app pics could be a whole adventure not a chore… You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photo shoots. All photos taken by Hey Saturday photographers, UK & US. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
Whoop! Reliving happy moments from last month when I was visiting LA and was hanging out in Abbot Kinney, the Arts District Downtown and Silver Lake, all fab Hey Saturday locations. These gorgeous shots, captured by Vanessa, were taken in the Arts District and I’m loving the energy, colour and good vibes. Photo credit: Vanessa for Hey Saturday, Los Angeles. All photos taken by US & UK Hey Saturday photographers. You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages #ᴇxᴘʟᴏʀᴇʀᴇᴇʟs
The Two Key Ingredients for a Great Dating Profile 📣 new blog post alert 📣 A new study has just dropped that encourages dating app users to embrace originality when creating their dating profile text. Just as I encourage our clients to visually show how they stand out from others in their profile pictures, this study has backed up what dating experts, like James Preece, have been saying all along too… Lose the generic, cliché-ridden text and share something meaningful instead - like what makes you special/different from everyone else. The researchers attempted to understand what precisely makes for compelling profile text. They found that highly original text tended to contain one or more of the following 5 elements: • Metaphorical expressions (e.g. “I’m a rock-star at cooking curries” vs “I’m a good cook”) • Vivid descriptions & imagery ….. .. Head to the blog to read more - link in bio. You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages #ᴇxᴘʟᴏʀᴇʀᴇᴇʟs
Love this tried and tested hack for our clients who aren’t feeling ‘enough’ the day of their dating photoshoot. The moment they take hold of something that brings them joy - their camera, their yoga mat, their boxing gloves, their paintbrush or whatever it may be - they immediately relax, smile and feel at ease with themselves. I love this moment so much and it creates such great profile pics ✨ All photos taken by US & UK Hey Saturday photographers. You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages #ᴇxᴘʟᴏʀᴇʀᴇᴇʟs
These dating photos are so my jam. I’m adoring the bold colour and variety of backgrounds. Shouts out to Suze, who shot these on the streets of Clifton Village in Bristol. Photo credit: Suze for Hey Saturday, Bristol You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
If your dating app pics make people smile, they’re going to feel happy while looking at your profile. That means they are waaaaay more likely to want to reach out and connect with you. And that’s the kind of response we love ✨ All photos taken by US & UK Hey Saturday photographers. You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepağes
Our Magic 8 Ball says ‘Heck yes”. Loving this playful set from Alison shot on location on the streets of NYC. Such a fun set. Can you tell, we are the happiest dating photoshoots on the planet :) Photo credit: Alison for Hey Saturday, New York City You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepağes
How can I relax into my dating photoshoot? ✨ Do what you love ✨ When we are in flow, we don’t feel self-conscious. We feel free 🙌🏽 All photos taken by US & UK Hey Saturday photographers. You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
Full disclosure! Our dating profile pics are a gateway to a fun dating life, good times and sometimes an epic love story so strong, it’ll make Oscar Issac and Jessica Chastain’s red carpet moment look a bit meh. J’adoring this ace stand-out set from the talent that is Nicole, transforming the streets of Shoredtich into a gorgeous backdrop for a dating photoshoot. Photo credit: Nicole for Hey Saturday, London You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepağes
Let your dating profile pics show people how you move through the world ✨✨ All photos taken by US & UK Hey Saturday photographers. You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepağes
Heck yes, this is why we call our photoshoots the happiest dating photoshoots. J’adoring these gorgeous shots created by Livia in the colourful Northern Quarter. Photo credit: Livia for Hey Saturday, Manchester You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots ✨ #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
The world is so ready for you to show up in a meaningful way on your dating profile 👏🏽👏🏽 All photos taken by US & UK Hey Saturday photographers ✨✨ You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepağes
Hey go-getters, thrill-seekers and online daters.... our dating photoshoots are a good time. Absolutely j’adoring these gorgeous shots created by Vanessa at Abbot Kinney & as I’m currently chilling in LA, I thought I just gotta share. Photo credit: Vanessa for Hey Saturday, Los Angeles #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
+ Take up space in the frame + Taking up a lot of physical space in the frame instantly makes you more attractive to others…. …Researchers discovered that open body language or “expansive postures” conveys both confidence as well as a sense of openness. People are more likely to come across as warm, friendly, trustworthy as well as comfortable in their own skin - great for dating pics ✨ You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photo shoots. All photos taken by Hey Saturday photographers #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
Well this dating photoshoot is just a whole vibe. Shouts out to Megan for creating this fab set and huge kudos to the client who brought his A-game, dang. Photo credit: Megan for Hey Saturday, Birmingham You have been watching Hey Saturday 🔥 #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
It’s soooo important to get your self-talk right on a dating photoshoot… I mean nobody’s perfect but dang do we all fall short so beautifully 🔥🔥 All photos taken by Hey Saturday photographers You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots. #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
Brighton dating photoshoot 🔥🔥 I was lucky enough to head to Brighton this week and catch up with one of our Brighton photographers, Lauren … & I gotta tell you, it's a dang-good gorgeous place for a dating photoshoot. Check out these cool shots from Lauren, who transforms the streets into a Hey Saturday playground. Loving the colour, personality and vibrance. Photo credit: Lauren for Hey Saturday, Brighton You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest dating photoshoots 🔥 #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages
Never underestimate the power & magic of goofing off during your dating photoshoot. It helps create the best profile pics & usually means you end up having a good time 😆 You have been watching Hey Saturday, the happiest… & er goofiest dating photoshoots 🔥 *Filmed by @northernmunki #singleandhappy #modernlove #mindset #loveyourself #goofingoff #datingwithapurpose #datingadvice #datinglife #profilepictures #profilepic #profilepics #profilephoto #onlinedating #datingphototips #happylife #happysingle #relationshipgoals #personalbrandingtips #datingapp #datingapps #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #profilephotography #visualstorytelling #onlinedatingphotographer #datingphotos #explore #explorepages